Healthy anger is assertiveness, confidence in saying no and having clear boundaries. It is determined direction, commitment, expansiveness, light hearted expansiveness. At times of growth it gives people the strength to separate from the mother or carers. How to support the explosive growth of children and especially of girls, so that assertiveness, strength and confidence are developed.
If this spontaneous assertiveness is compromised, your space and boundaries are not protected, you let someone push you to do things you don’t want to do, you may feel frustrated anger. But negative anger does not help you expand and grow. It is like poison.
Being angry is like taking poison and expecting that someone else will die from it. The Dalai Lama
People suffer immensely from anger and the inability to forgive.
It is the most painful emotion because of its attacking nature. That makes it have so many derivatives like hatred, rage, resentment, hostility, jealousy, envy, frustration, control, guilt and shame. People often find it easier to attack themselves than others, and find it very difficult to forgive themselves. Becoming aware of self blame may be the beginning of forgiveness.
Byron Bays founded school called the Healing journey based on forgiveness after she had cured herself from cancer. She discovered that forgiveness redeems the soul and body from toxic emotions
The Dalai Lama, has become a world spiritual leader after the occupation of Tibet. As the 14th reincarnation of the Buddha of Compassion he teaches compassion as the highest form of love and forgiveness as the highest virtue. When asked who is his greatest spiritual teacher, he said: “Mao Che Tung”.